I'm going to keep track of how I do against the line this football season. So without further ado, here goes.
Bengals -2 vs. Ravens - Bengals
Jets -3 vs. Dolphins - Jets
Chiefs +15.5 vs. Patriots - Pats
Texans +6.5 vs. Steelers - Steelers
Jags -3 vs. Titans - Titans
Lions -3 vs. Falcons - Lions
Seahawks +1 vs. Buffalo - Seahawks
Bucs +3 vs. Saints - Saints
Rams +7.5 vs. Eagles - Eagles
Cowboys -6 vs. Browns - Cowboys
Panthers +9 vs. San Diego - Panthers
Cardinals -2.5 vs. 49ers - Cards
Bears +9.5 vs. Colts - Colts
Vikings +2.5 vs. Packers - Packers
Broncos -3 vs. Raiders - Broncos
Saturday, September 6, 2008
Fearless Pittsburgh Predictions, 10 NFL Predictions
Fearless Pittsburgh 2008 Predictions
Like the Texans predictions I made, I thought I'd project that same objectivity and try and predict how the Steelers season will go. Hope my buddy Dave enjoys it.
Game 1 vs. Texans - As I said in the last email, Texans lose but Big Ben gets so bored during the game that he states in post game interviews,"The next time we play the Texans, I probably won't show up. I'll have more fun masturbating."
Game 2 @ Cleveland - Steelers win but during the game Hines Ward has a divine revelation and decides to give up football immediately and seek his true calling. He calls up Kordell Stewart, puts on his assless leather chaps and they go spend a night on the town.
Game 3 @ Philly - Steelers lose amid the cursing, trash throwing, howling Eagles fans. Santonio Holmes wanders to close to the Eagles fans and is never seen or heard from again.
Game 4 vs. Ravens - Bill Cowher is the guest head coach for the Ravens. He brings back Cliff Stoudt and Jack Lambert to play for the Ravens. Willie Parker is hit by both Lambert and Ray Lewis on the first play from scrimmage. Lambert inflicts pain on Parker. Parker leaves the game only to be found crying in a bathroom stall. Steelers lose and Cowher, Stoudt and Lambert go back into retirement.
Game 5 @ Jacksonville - An unusually large hurricane threatens Florida. Steelers decide to forfeit and go read books to orphans.
Game 6 - not realizing it's the bye week, the Steelers show up to play before a packed house. They win the toss and manage to score a TD three plays later.
Game 7 @ Cincinnati - still hurting from the bye week loss, the Steelers are in a fog and show up in Cleveland instead of Cincinnati.
Game 8 vs. NY Giants - Old Man Dan Rooney streaks across the field on a dare from the other Rooney brothers. He's arrested and handed over to a group of shemale trannies. Steelers would have won the game if it weren't for terrible special teams play.
Game 9 @ Washington - Old Man Dan Rooney shows up in the team locker room to give a pregame speech dressed like the trannies he spent the week with. He's accompanied by Kordell Stewart and Hines Ward. The team is in shock and go out and lose the Redskins buy an ugly score. 69 - 0.
Game 10 vs. Indianapolis - The team is psyched up to play the Colts. Jenna Jamison, Tera Patrick and 51 other porn stars show up to "inspire" the Steelers. The team comes out of the locker room crying cause to quote Heath Miller,"These nasty women tried to touch our wee wee's. My mama told me that was only for me to touch...waaahh..."
Game 11 vs. San Diego - After hearing the term "pigskin" to describe a football, the Steelers refuse to come out of the locker room because they think it would be icky to touch something that used to be alive.
Game 12 vs. Cincinnati - Assured that a football is made from synthetic material, the Steelers agree to take the field against the Bengals. It's all for naught as TJ Housh and Chad Johnson each score six TDs. Troy Polamalu says after the game,"My feelings are really hurt. I'm sad because TJ and Chad laughed at me, pointed at my hair and kept call me a girl every time they ran by me."
Game 13 @ New England - Big Ben runs out to shake Tom Brady's hand and asks to see Brady's Super Bowl rings since he's never seen one. Brady calls Ben an idiot and reminds him that he too has a Super Bowl ring. Polamalu feels better this week after coach Mike Tomlin assures him all week at practice that he's still pretty.
Game 14 vs. Dallas - Since America's Team is coming to town, the Rooneys have punter Daniel Sepulveda deported. The name just sounded to Spanish for them and they didn't want the Cowboys to think they hired illegals.
Game 15 @ Baltimore - Ray Lewis beats the crap out of Justin Hartwig after Hartwig repeatedly touches Lewis's crotch and asks to see his Baltimore Colt. Lewis gently reminds Hartwig that the Colts are in Indy.
Game 16 @ Tennessee - Thinking they are playing the Tennessee Volunteers, the Steelers decide wear Florida Gator uniforms. Unfortunately the tactic fails miserably when they show up in Knoxville instead of Nashville.
Game 17 vs. Cleveland - The team refuses to take the field when in protest of not having a bye week. Jerome Bettis comes out of retirement and plays defense, offense and special teams. The Steelers win on a last second 72 yard TD pass play that Bettis completes to himself. He calls the rest of the Steelers a bunch wimps. A chariot of fire descends the heavens to take Bettis away.
Top Ten Predictions for the NFL Season
1. Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson get married. Tony agrees to change his last name to Simpson and later changes his first name to Jesse.
2. Terrell Owens and Pacman Jones beat the living day lights out of Mr. Simpson after the wedding.
3. Dallas goes 0-16 after Mr. Simpson breaks a nail. He also complains of bloating and cramps.
4. The Indianapolis Colts go undefeated only to lose the Super Bowl. Manning states after the game he's just trying to keep pace with Tom Brady.
5. Jacksonville announces relocation to Youngstown, OH for the 2009 season. Dave gets a Jaguar helmet for Christmas.
6. Mario Williams finally gets a hard, bone rattling hit on Vince Young. Young announces his retirement over the Reliant Stadium PA at half time.
7. Eli Manning tells Peyton Manning that he thinks Tom Brady is the better quarterback. Peyton starts crying and Archie Manning sends Eli to time out in the corner.
8. Al Davis insists that all Raider fans dressed like Darth Raider call him Emperor Palpatine.
9. Ravens and Colts ownership agree to change team names thus returning the Colt name to its rightful place in Baltimore.
10. Bob McNair buys the Oiler name back from Bud Adams returning the Oiler name back to Houston. Adams changes the name of the Titans to the Tennessee Texans.
Like the Texans predictions I made, I thought I'd project that same objectivity and try and predict how the Steelers season will go. Hope my buddy Dave enjoys it.
Game 1 vs. Texans - As I said in the last email, Texans lose but Big Ben gets so bored during the game that he states in post game interviews,"The next time we play the Texans, I probably won't show up. I'll have more fun masturbating."
Game 2 @ Cleveland - Steelers win but during the game Hines Ward has a divine revelation and decides to give up football immediately and seek his true calling. He calls up Kordell Stewart, puts on his assless leather chaps and they go spend a night on the town.
Game 3 @ Philly - Steelers lose amid the cursing, trash throwing, howling Eagles fans. Santonio Holmes wanders to close to the Eagles fans and is never seen or heard from again.
Game 4 vs. Ravens - Bill Cowher is the guest head coach for the Ravens. He brings back Cliff Stoudt and Jack Lambert to play for the Ravens. Willie Parker is hit by both Lambert and Ray Lewis on the first play from scrimmage. Lambert inflicts pain on Parker. Parker leaves the game only to be found crying in a bathroom stall. Steelers lose and Cowher, Stoudt and Lambert go back into retirement.
Game 5 @ Jacksonville - An unusually large hurricane threatens Florida. Steelers decide to forfeit and go read books to orphans.
Game 6 - not realizing it's the bye week, the Steelers show up to play before a packed house. They win the toss and manage to score a TD three plays later.
Game 7 @ Cincinnati - still hurting from the bye week loss, the Steelers are in a fog and show up in Cleveland instead of Cincinnati.
Game 8 vs. NY Giants - Old Man Dan Rooney streaks across the field on a dare from the other Rooney brothers. He's arrested and handed over to a group of shemale trannies. Steelers would have won the game if it weren't for terrible special teams play.
Game 9 @ Washington - Old Man Dan Rooney shows up in the team locker room to give a pregame speech dressed like the trannies he spent the week with. He's accompanied by Kordell Stewart and Hines Ward. The team is in shock and go out and lose the Redskins buy an ugly score. 69 - 0.
Game 10 vs. Indianapolis - The team is psyched up to play the Colts. Jenna Jamison, Tera Patrick and 51 other porn stars show up to "inspire" the Steelers. The team comes out of the locker room crying cause to quote Heath Miller,"These nasty women tried to touch our wee wee's. My mama told me that was only for me to touch...waaahh..."
Game 11 vs. San Diego - After hearing the term "pigskin" to describe a football, the Steelers refuse to come out of the locker room because they think it would be icky to touch something that used to be alive.
Game 12 vs. Cincinnati - Assured that a football is made from synthetic material, the Steelers agree to take the field against the Bengals. It's all for naught as TJ Housh and Chad Johnson each score six TDs. Troy Polamalu says after the game,"My feelings are really hurt. I'm sad because TJ and Chad laughed at me, pointed at my hair and kept call me a girl every time they ran by me."
Game 13 @ New England - Big Ben runs out to shake Tom Brady's hand and asks to see Brady's Super Bowl rings since he's never seen one. Brady calls Ben an idiot and reminds him that he too has a Super Bowl ring. Polamalu feels better this week after coach Mike Tomlin assures him all week at practice that he's still pretty.
Game 14 vs. Dallas - Since America's Team is coming to town, the Rooneys have punter Daniel Sepulveda deported. The name just sounded to Spanish for them and they didn't want the Cowboys to think they hired illegals.
Game 15 @ Baltimore - Ray Lewis beats the crap out of Justin Hartwig after Hartwig repeatedly touches Lewis's crotch and asks to see his Baltimore Colt. Lewis gently reminds Hartwig that the Colts are in Indy.
Game 16 @ Tennessee - Thinking they are playing the Tennessee Volunteers, the Steelers decide wear Florida Gator uniforms. Unfortunately the tactic fails miserably when they show up in Knoxville instead of Nashville.
Game 17 vs. Cleveland - The team refuses to take the field when in protest of not having a bye week. Jerome Bettis comes out of retirement and plays defense, offense and special teams. The Steelers win on a last second 72 yard TD pass play that Bettis completes to himself. He calls the rest of the Steelers a bunch wimps. A chariot of fire descends the heavens to take Bettis away.
Top Ten Predictions for the NFL Season
1. Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson get married. Tony agrees to change his last name to Simpson and later changes his first name to Jesse.
2. Terrell Owens and Pacman Jones beat the living day lights out of Mr. Simpson after the wedding.
3. Dallas goes 0-16 after Mr. Simpson breaks a nail. He also complains of bloating and cramps.
4. The Indianapolis Colts go undefeated only to lose the Super Bowl. Manning states after the game he's just trying to keep pace with Tom Brady.
5. Jacksonville announces relocation to Youngstown, OH for the 2009 season. Dave gets a Jaguar helmet for Christmas.
6. Mario Williams finally gets a hard, bone rattling hit on Vince Young. Young announces his retirement over the Reliant Stadium PA at half time.
7. Eli Manning tells Peyton Manning that he thinks Tom Brady is the better quarterback. Peyton starts crying and Archie Manning sends Eli to time out in the corner.
8. Al Davis insists that all Raider fans dressed like Darth Raider call him Emperor Palpatine.
9. Ravens and Colts ownership agree to change team names thus returning the Colt name to its rightful place in Baltimore.
10. Bob McNair buys the Oiler name back from Bud Adams returning the Oiler name back to Houston. Adams changes the name of the Titans to the Tennessee Texans.
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
Fearless Predictions for the Texans 2008 Season
Well not really a rant but my bold prediction for the Texans season. No rosed colored Kool-Aid drinking fan here. I'll save the Joe Pisarcik reference for opening day (that's a good sign that I can't think of one). And I can't fail to say how much I hate Herm Edwards and he's the worst coach in the league. And why the hell is Matt Millen still a GM?
Game 1 @ Pittsburgh - Another opening day loss for the Texans. The running duo of Willie Parker and rookie Rashard Mendenhall leave their footprints all over the defensive line. In turn it opens up the pass for Ben Roethlisberger and the WR tandem of Hines Ward and Santonio Holmes. The offense puts up a spirited fight and is able to put some points up against an overrated Steelers defense but it won't be enough. Steelers win 35-24
Game 2 vs. Baltimore - Coming home bruised and battered, the Texans take frustrations out on the Ravens. The once vaunted Ravens defense isn't what it used to be. Matt Schaub is able to find Andre Johnson for a couple of TDs and Kevin Walters keeps making clutch receptions over the middle. The defense isn't able to pressure the Ravens offense but there really isn't
much to fear. Texans win 24-14.
Game 3 @ Tennessee - Vince Young continues to struggle early in the season but the Texans defense can't contain him. He makes just enough plays to keep the defense on the field and the running game tires out the Texans. The Texans offensive line is able to hold the tough Titan defensive line in check on the passing game but not able to open running lanes for Steve Slanton. Young and company keep the Texans offense off the field as the Titans win 17-10.
Game 4 @ Jacksonville - This is the unlikeliest and probably least known rivalries in the NFL. Basically cause no one outside of Houston or Jacksonville gives a rat's ass. Jacksonville is looking to make a big push and challenge for the division crown. It's early but it's a must win for the Jags to be able to keep up with the Colts and stay ahead of the Titans and Texans. Personal fouls are the story of the day and Anthony Weaver gets ejected. Jags win 28-24.
Game 5 vs. Indianapolis - The Texans limp home 1-3 and the sky is falling on the sports talk shows. Some idiots are calling for head coach Kubiak's head. The Texans defense once again is run all over by Peyton Manning and Joseph Addai. The Texans offensive line takes a step back and Schaub eaves the game hurt. Sage Rosefels comes in and sparks to offense to a touchdown but that's it. Colts win 42-17.
Game 6 vs. Miami - The Dolphins roll into town and it's just what the doctor ordered. Ricky Williams and Ronnie Brown start off strong early but the defense stiffens and holds Miami out of the endzone for most of the game. Matt Schaub shakes of the Indy game injury and has a field day picking off Dolphin corners. Texans win 27-13.
Game 7 vs. Detroit - Mario Williams notches two or three sacks and the defense has a carry over from the Miami game. Still the offense struggles to find the end zone and have to rely on Kris Brown's leg. Four field goals and two touchdowns are enough for the Texans to win 26-21.
Game 8 @ Minnesota - Adrian Peterson and Chester Taylor run all over the defense. Tavaris Jackson meets Mario Williams once. Schaub is harassed all day long by the Vikings defensive line. It gets ugly and early. Vikings win 38-10.
Game 9 vs. Cincinnati - The scoreboard is in constant motion as neither defense is able to stop the air attack of the other team. The Texans win on the strength of a Andre Davis kickoff return. Final score Texans 42 - Bengals 35. Defensive coordinator Rich Smith is fired after the game marking the second time after a Bengals game that heads roll. It was after a loss to the Bengals that Jack Pardee and Kevin Gilbride were taken out back and shot. Yeah I know that was Oilers.
Game 10 @ Indianapolis - And the firing of Smith does nothing. The defense is again lit up. The home crowd in a new stadium gets into the heads of the offense and Matt Schaub is bench after taking a beating. Rosenfels does no better. Colts win in a laugher 45-7.
Game 11 @ Cleveland - The Texans are once again road kill. A decent showing by the offense but a long day for the defense. Derek Anderson, Braylon Edwards and Kellen Winslow have a fun day and the Dawg Pound howls late into the night.
Game 12 vs. Jacksonville - Battle Red game day goes prime time on a Monday night and the Texans usually get pumped up for this one game. The Texans have only lost one or two home games against the Jags in the short franchise history. This is another home win as the defense puts all together and hold the Jags to 10 points. The offense moves the ball all day long but only get into the endzone twice and once again Kris Brown puts up four field goals. Texans win 26-10
Game 13 @ Green Bay - Green Bay, in December, on the frozen tundra but Brett Farve is gone. Come on, this is the Texans. They fall to the Packers by taking ineptitude to a new level. Schaub is bruised and batter, the defense is batter and bruised. The only bright spot is when the game clock reads 00:00. Green Bay wins 49-0.
Game 14 vs. Tennessee - The annual TNT game. Vince Young and Titan fans show up in droves and start a near riot as Young finally has a bad game against the Texans. Three INTs and a bunch of wounded ducks fly off Young's hand. The offense still has a hard time versus the Titan defense but it's Young's bad game that let's the Texans win 24-13.
Game 15 @ Oakland - Both teams are playing for nothing in a game only girlfriends, wives and diehards watch. It's a sloppy game by both teams but the Texans win again in Oakland 13-7.
Game 16 vs Chicago - The season mercifully comes to an end as the Texans take care of the hapless Bears 35-17.
The Texans once again finish 8-8 and fans call for Kubiak's head. It won't happen. They finally draft a running back in the first round and that's as far into the future I can see.
Game 1 @ Pittsburgh - Another opening day loss for the Texans. The running duo of Willie Parker and rookie Rashard Mendenhall leave their footprints all over the defensive line. In turn it opens up the pass for Ben Roethlisberger and the WR tandem of Hines Ward and Santonio Holmes. The offense puts up a spirited fight and is able to put some points up against an overrated Steelers defense but it won't be enough. Steelers win 35-24
Game 2 vs. Baltimore - Coming home bruised and battered, the Texans take frustrations out on the Ravens. The once vaunted Ravens defense isn't what it used to be. Matt Schaub is able to find Andre Johnson for a couple of TDs and Kevin Walters keeps making clutch receptions over the middle. The defense isn't able to pressure the Ravens offense but there really isn't
much to fear. Texans win 24-14.
Game 3 @ Tennessee - Vince Young continues to struggle early in the season but the Texans defense can't contain him. He makes just enough plays to keep the defense on the field and the running game tires out the Texans. The Texans offensive line is able to hold the tough Titan defensive line in check on the passing game but not able to open running lanes for Steve Slanton. Young and company keep the Texans offense off the field as the Titans win 17-10.
Game 4 @ Jacksonville - This is the unlikeliest and probably least known rivalries in the NFL. Basically cause no one outside of Houston or Jacksonville gives a rat's ass. Jacksonville is looking to make a big push and challenge for the division crown. It's early but it's a must win for the Jags to be able to keep up with the Colts and stay ahead of the Titans and Texans. Personal fouls are the story of the day and Anthony Weaver gets ejected. Jags win 28-24.
Game 5 vs. Indianapolis - The Texans limp home 1-3 and the sky is falling on the sports talk shows. Some idiots are calling for head coach Kubiak's head. The Texans defense once again is run all over by Peyton Manning and Joseph Addai. The Texans offensive line takes a step back and Schaub eaves the game hurt. Sage Rosefels comes in and sparks to offense to a touchdown but that's it. Colts win 42-17.
Game 6 vs. Miami - The Dolphins roll into town and it's just what the doctor ordered. Ricky Williams and Ronnie Brown start off strong early but the defense stiffens and holds Miami out of the endzone for most of the game. Matt Schaub shakes of the Indy game injury and has a field day picking off Dolphin corners. Texans win 27-13.
Game 7 vs. Detroit - Mario Williams notches two or three sacks and the defense has a carry over from the Miami game. Still the offense struggles to find the end zone and have to rely on Kris Brown's leg. Four field goals and two touchdowns are enough for the Texans to win 26-21.
Game 8 @ Minnesota - Adrian Peterson and Chester Taylor run all over the defense. Tavaris Jackson meets Mario Williams once. Schaub is harassed all day long by the Vikings defensive line. It gets ugly and early. Vikings win 38-10.
Game 9 vs. Cincinnati - The scoreboard is in constant motion as neither defense is able to stop the air attack of the other team. The Texans win on the strength of a Andre Davis kickoff return. Final score Texans 42 - Bengals 35. Defensive coordinator Rich Smith is fired after the game marking the second time after a Bengals game that heads roll. It was after a loss to the Bengals that Jack Pardee and Kevin Gilbride were taken out back and shot. Yeah I know that was Oilers.
Game 10 @ Indianapolis - And the firing of Smith does nothing. The defense is again lit up. The home crowd in a new stadium gets into the heads of the offense and Matt Schaub is bench after taking a beating. Rosenfels does no better. Colts win in a laugher 45-7.
Game 11 @ Cleveland - The Texans are once again road kill. A decent showing by the offense but a long day for the defense. Derek Anderson, Braylon Edwards and Kellen Winslow have a fun day and the Dawg Pound howls late into the night.
Game 12 vs. Jacksonville - Battle Red game day goes prime time on a Monday night and the Texans usually get pumped up for this one game. The Texans have only lost one or two home games against the Jags in the short franchise history. This is another home win as the defense puts all together and hold the Jags to 10 points. The offense moves the ball all day long but only get into the endzone twice and once again Kris Brown puts up four field goals. Texans win 26-10
Game 13 @ Green Bay - Green Bay, in December, on the frozen tundra but Brett Farve is gone. Come on, this is the Texans. They fall to the Packers by taking ineptitude to a new level. Schaub is bruised and batter, the defense is batter and bruised. The only bright spot is when the game clock reads 00:00. Green Bay wins 49-0.
Game 14 vs. Tennessee - The annual TNT game. Vince Young and Titan fans show up in droves and start a near riot as Young finally has a bad game against the Texans. Three INTs and a bunch of wounded ducks fly off Young's hand. The offense still has a hard time versus the Titan defense but it's Young's bad game that let's the Texans win 24-13.
Game 15 @ Oakland - Both teams are playing for nothing in a game only girlfriends, wives and diehards watch. It's a sloppy game by both teams but the Texans win again in Oakland 13-7.
Game 16 vs Chicago - The season mercifully comes to an end as the Texans take care of the hapless Bears 35-17.
The Texans once again finish 8-8 and fans call for Kubiak's head. It won't happen. They finally draft a running back in the first round and that's as far into the future I can see.
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Texans ESPN love and Houston Astros need to keep losing
First off are some sound bites I edited out of ESPN podcasts. They are giving love to my Texans.
This take is a little dated after the Astros lost a couple of games to Arizona but it's worth a post.
Well damn, I had the Houston Astros dead and buried. Right now the team is 7 1/2 games behind in the NL wild card race. Recently the Astros have been an unbelievable post All-Star team. There was the run in 2004 when Jimy Williams was fired and Phil Garner took the team to a 46-26 second half run that won the NL wild card and a seven game epic series against St. Louis.
In 2005 they started 15-30 before storming to a July record of 22-7 to find themselves in the thick of the wild card race. They clinched the wild card on the last day of the season and went on to that embarrassing sweep in the World Series. In 2006 they once again made a late season push for the wild card. They also came with in 1/2 game of the NL Central lead on Sept. 28. 2007 was a wash that saw the end of manager Phil Garner and GM Tim Purpura.
That brings us to this season. With 41 games remaining, there are four teams ahead in the wild card standings and the Astros are tied with two teams. That basically means the Astros not only have to catch the four teams in front but they must out play the teams they are tied with. It's a tall order but another incredible run and it's not out of reach. The first focus is to continue winning and try to catch the team, the Florida Marlins, in front of them. There isn't room for error though. They are on a hot streak. Let's see if they can stay hot or revert to midseason form.
As I've written before, the Astros are a mess. The farm system is in shambles. Drayton McClain doesn't want to pay high signing bonuses for top draft picks. There are no pitchers waiting in the wings to move to the major league level anytime soon. The same situation applies to the position players. It's not pretty.
That all leads me to say: the Astros either clinching the wild card spot or making hot run at it is probably the worse thing that can happen to the Astros. Why? Simple. A strong finish will more than likely validate in McClain's mind that the team is being run correctly. Why change the way things are run? McClain will continue to sign off on making one big free agent signing every two or three years. The Astros will then supplement the team with marginal players and questionable trades. McClain will probably continue to balk at paying high draft picks upfront money and the farm system will remain empty.
The direction the Astros are going in must change soon. At the top of the list is rebuilding the farm system. Unfortunately I don't think McClain has the patience to restock the farm and let the youth work their way up.
McClain also has to be more hands off in running the club. Yes he writes the checks and has the power but he's not a baseball man. The last time the Astros had a strong GM was in Gerry Hunsicker. During his reign, the Astros won four division titles and had five second place finishes. Evidently Hunsincker and McClain clashed and resulted in him leaving the club in 2004. Now the GMs are probably handcuffed by McClain. McClain needs to let Ed Wade loose and let him have free hand in rebuilding the club.
While not exactly a premier club in major leagues, the Astros are have been one of the more consistent and successful clubs since 1994. They have had multiple second place finishes, won the division four times and clinched the wild card spot two times along with one World Series appearance. If the continue on the current track the Astros will slide to the back of the pack and McClain's worse nightmare will happen: a cavernous empty Minute Maid Field.
This take is a little dated after the Astros lost a couple of games to Arizona but it's worth a post.
Well damn, I had the Houston Astros dead and buried. Right now the team is 7 1/2 games behind in the NL wild card race. Recently the Astros have been an unbelievable post All-Star team. There was the run in 2004 when Jimy Williams was fired and Phil Garner took the team to a 46-26 second half run that won the NL wild card and a seven game epic series against St. Louis.
In 2005 they started 15-30 before storming to a July record of 22-7 to find themselves in the thick of the wild card race. They clinched the wild card on the last day of the season and went on to that embarrassing sweep in the World Series. In 2006 they once again made a late season push for the wild card. They also came with in 1/2 game of the NL Central lead on Sept. 28. 2007 was a wash that saw the end of manager Phil Garner and GM Tim Purpura.
That brings us to this season. With 41 games remaining, there are four teams ahead in the wild card standings and the Astros are tied with two teams. That basically means the Astros not only have to catch the four teams in front but they must out play the teams they are tied with. It's a tall order but another incredible run and it's not out of reach. The first focus is to continue winning and try to catch the team, the Florida Marlins, in front of them. There isn't room for error though. They are on a hot streak. Let's see if they can stay hot or revert to midseason form.
As I've written before, the Astros are a mess. The farm system is in shambles. Drayton McClain doesn't want to pay high signing bonuses for top draft picks. There are no pitchers waiting in the wings to move to the major league level anytime soon. The same situation applies to the position players. It's not pretty.
That all leads me to say: the Astros either clinching the wild card spot or making hot run at it is probably the worse thing that can happen to the Astros. Why? Simple. A strong finish will more than likely validate in McClain's mind that the team is being run correctly. Why change the way things are run? McClain will continue to sign off on making one big free agent signing every two or three years. The Astros will then supplement the team with marginal players and questionable trades. McClain will probably continue to balk at paying high draft picks upfront money and the farm system will remain empty.
The direction the Astros are going in must change soon. At the top of the list is rebuilding the farm system. Unfortunately I don't think McClain has the patience to restock the farm and let the youth work their way up.
McClain also has to be more hands off in running the club. Yes he writes the checks and has the power but he's not a baseball man. The last time the Astros had a strong GM was in Gerry Hunsicker. During his reign, the Astros won four division titles and had five second place finishes. Evidently Hunsincker and McClain clashed and resulted in him leaving the club in 2004. Now the GMs are probably handcuffed by McClain. McClain needs to let Ed Wade loose and let him have free hand in rebuilding the club.
While not exactly a premier club in major leagues, the Astros are have been one of the more consistent and successful clubs since 1994. They have had multiple second place finishes, won the division four times and clinched the wild card spot two times along with one World Series appearance. If the continue on the current track the Astros will slide to the back of the pack and McClain's worse nightmare will happen: a cavernous empty Minute Maid Field.
Sunday, August 10, 2008
I haven't been updating this blog as much as I hoped. With football season starting up the updates should at least be weekly. I spent the last week on vacation so most my ideas to write are probably out of date. So I'll just gloss over what I've kept up with for the last few days.
Astros
As much as I've been railing on the Astros, I still watch them out of the corner of my eye. I see the swept the Reds but they lose Carlos Lee for the season. That just sucks to lose him for the year. It's just another feather in the cap of a horrendous season. It's not to long until the September call ups and we get to see up close the thin ranks of the Astros farm system.
Texans Observations
I've had attention deficit disorder during NFL training camps. I'm not up to snuff on the latest news. Part of the reason is I just didn't follow news while on vacation.
A couple of concerns are already coming up with the Texans. Running back is looking thin already but what do you expect when a team goes out and signs injury plagued backs? A backfield of Ahman Green and Chris Brown doesn't strike the fear of God into opposing defenses. Green got hurt on the first play and didn't return to the preseason game against Denver. Chris Brown has pretty much been a no show at camp. He dressed for the game but didn't play. The injuries moves Chris Taylor, Darius Walker and rookie Steve Slanton to the top of the depth chart. All types of hype surrounds Taylor but I'm not to sure since it's all based on one game two years ago. Then they are working him out also as a fullback. A team doesn't work a running back at both spots if they are extremely high on him like the Texans are supposed to be on Taylor.
The other concern is the offensive line. Injuries are already an issue and depth is going to be a concern. At least rookie left tackle Duane Brown seems to be coming along nicely. With Ephrim Salaam's knee surgery it more than likely Brown will now be the opening day starter. My dream though is for someone to unseat Chester Pitts the worst lineman on the team.
Olympic Swimming, Gymnastics, U.S. Basketball
As much as I claim to dislike the Olympics, I've been watching coverage the last two nights. I've been amazed by the swimming events. I'm not caught up in rooting for the Americans or Michael Phelps quest for eight gold medals. What's been enthralling me is the pure athleticism of the swimmers. I love watching them jump in or push off the wall and seeing the distance they get underwater by waving their body. Then the shear intensity of the races and some of the amazing finishes. It's just been a joy to watch.
I also watched the women's gymnastics. The grace and athleticism of the floor exercises was fun to watch. Unfortunately the Americans faltered on three of the four floor exercises and a fifth girl was injured in warm ups. With the injury the U.S. team had to accept all four scores instead of taking the four of five. Even though it was a disappointing start they are still second overall with China in first.
The U.S. men's team is the one that I'm conflicted about. One part of me would like to a spectacular failure. On the other side I'd love to see them tear through the competition and recapture the gold. I get all nationalistic at times but I get tired of hearing about the Redeem Team. If Redeem Team isn't the lamest name for the team I don't know what is. I have no problem with the rest of the world catching up with the U.S. in basketball. It makes for better competitions and legitimizes all U.S. victories. What is the accomplishment if the field is a joke and winning the gold? Nothing in my eyes. Also, the press is acting like the U.S. has a God given right to the gold and shouldn't have to earn it. I like a tough field and want some competition for the U.S. In the end, I hope they bring home the gold.
Finally, what the hell is Chris Collingsworth doing covering the Olympics? He's worthless as a football commentator and doesn't add anything to the Olympics. NBC just needed warm bodies to send to China.
Astros
As much as I've been railing on the Astros, I still watch them out of the corner of my eye. I see the swept the Reds but they lose Carlos Lee for the season. That just sucks to lose him for the year. It's just another feather in the cap of a horrendous season. It's not to long until the September call ups and we get to see up close the thin ranks of the Astros farm system.
Texans Observations
I've had attention deficit disorder during NFL training camps. I'm not up to snuff on the latest news. Part of the reason is I just didn't follow news while on vacation.
A couple of concerns are already coming up with the Texans. Running back is looking thin already but what do you expect when a team goes out and signs injury plagued backs? A backfield of Ahman Green and Chris Brown doesn't strike the fear of God into opposing defenses. Green got hurt on the first play and didn't return to the preseason game against Denver. Chris Brown has pretty much been a no show at camp. He dressed for the game but didn't play. The injuries moves Chris Taylor, Darius Walker and rookie Steve Slanton to the top of the depth chart. All types of hype surrounds Taylor but I'm not to sure since it's all based on one game two years ago. Then they are working him out also as a fullback. A team doesn't work a running back at both spots if they are extremely high on him like the Texans are supposed to be on Taylor.
The other concern is the offensive line. Injuries are already an issue and depth is going to be a concern. At least rookie left tackle Duane Brown seems to be coming along nicely. With Ephrim Salaam's knee surgery it more than likely Brown will now be the opening day starter. My dream though is for someone to unseat Chester Pitts the worst lineman on the team.
Olympic Swimming, Gymnastics, U.S. Basketball
As much as I claim to dislike the Olympics, I've been watching coverage the last two nights. I've been amazed by the swimming events. I'm not caught up in rooting for the Americans or Michael Phelps quest for eight gold medals. What's been enthralling me is the pure athleticism of the swimmers. I love watching them jump in or push off the wall and seeing the distance they get underwater by waving their body. Then the shear intensity of the races and some of the amazing finishes. It's just been a joy to watch.
I also watched the women's gymnastics. The grace and athleticism of the floor exercises was fun to watch. Unfortunately the Americans faltered on three of the four floor exercises and a fifth girl was injured in warm ups. With the injury the U.S. team had to accept all four scores instead of taking the four of five. Even though it was a disappointing start they are still second overall with China in first.
The U.S. men's team is the one that I'm conflicted about. One part of me would like to a spectacular failure. On the other side I'd love to see them tear through the competition and recapture the gold. I get all nationalistic at times but I get tired of hearing about the Redeem Team. If Redeem Team isn't the lamest name for the team I don't know what is. I have no problem with the rest of the world catching up with the U.S. in basketball. It makes for better competitions and legitimizes all U.S. victories. What is the accomplishment if the field is a joke and winning the gold? Nothing in my eyes. Also, the press is acting like the U.S. has a God given right to the gold and shouldn't have to earn it. I like a tough field and want some competition for the U.S. In the end, I hope they bring home the gold.
Finally, what the hell is Chris Collingsworth doing covering the Olympics? He's worthless as a football commentator and doesn't add anything to the Olympics. NBC just needed warm bodies to send to China.
Saturday, July 19, 2008
Preseaon NFL rant
Training camps open up later this month and soon the NFL season will commence. It will be another season for me to root against Payton Manning, hate Herm Edwards, watch the Texans miss the playoffs and wait another year to go piss in the confluence of the rivers in Pittsburgh. Oh yeah and figure out how to make a Joe Pisarcik reference each week.
It will also be another season in which old man Ford tries to figure out how to fire Matt Millen from beyond. Maybe Tony Romo will remember to start his vacation after the season. And just maybe the Patriots will remember if you're going to lose a one game all year it shouldn't be the Super Bowl.
Being a Texans fan hasn't been easy but I scan the NFL landscape and rejoice I'm not a Dolphins or Bears fan. The Bear quarterback situation is a disaster. Only Miami fans can look at the Bears quarterbacks and be envious.
It's a shame Brett Farve didn't ride off into the sunset. At first I thought it was the media stirring up all the unretirement mess. Green Bay should have taken the high road and given Farve his release. Farve is a fierce competator and last year showed he can still be a good player. Realistically though where can Farve step into the starters role and make the team a serious Super Bowl contender? Minnesota comes to mind. Combine Farve with Adrian Peterson and the Vikings defense and the Vikes become a instant threat to win the NFC. However, I don't see Green Bay releasing him to play for a division archrival. The only other teams where Farve might be a good fit are Washington or Buffalo.
As much as it pains me to admit, Dallas is the class of the NFC but the Giants and Vikings are half a step behind. In the AFC it's the Pats and Colts with the Chargers and Jaguars a hair below.
Pittsburgh just has too many questions to be considered an elite team anymore. Age and free agency have caught up with the O-line. Denver and Jacksonville showed the Steelers can be pushed around. The Steelers can still win it all but it is a tough road with the Pats, Colts, Chargers and Jags standing in the way. An interesting side show will be if the Rooney brothers turn the ownership issue into an old man pissing match. As much as I like chaos, I'd hate to see the Rooneys no longer majority owners of the Steelers.
As usual I save my Texans comments for last. The hype is that the this might be the year the Texans make a playoff push. I don't see it happening it all. First of all the Colts and Jags reside in the same division. The Titans will have a big say on how the Texans season will go. The offensive line remains a big question mark. Matt Schaub needs to stay upright all season an running back needs to emerge. The defense has a nice base of young players in Mario Williams, Amobi Akoye and DeMeco Ryans but Dunta Robinson's injury keeps the second player off the field until November. To top it off the first five games are brutal. The first game is at Pittsburgh, first home game with the Ravens and on the road for games @Tennessee and @Jacksonville and the home to face the Colts. A 1-4 start isn't unrealistic and 0-5 is quiet possible.
The early predictions range from 7-9 to 9-7 with a rare 10-6. I'm jumping in on the early prediction business. My bold fearless prognostication is that they go 7-9. They start the season 1-4 with the Ravens the lone victory. The will split the season with the Jags and Titans with two losses to the Colts. Here's to hoping I'm wrong and they make the playoffs.
For the third season I'll be on my perch near the twenty five yard line yelling and wishing bad things on the opponent. In spite of my prediction....BRING ON THE STEELER!!!! That hatred still burns from the Oiler days.
It will also be another season in which old man Ford tries to figure out how to fire Matt Millen from beyond. Maybe Tony Romo will remember to start his vacation after the season. And just maybe the Patriots will remember if you're going to lose a one game all year it shouldn't be the Super Bowl.
Being a Texans fan hasn't been easy but I scan the NFL landscape and rejoice I'm not a Dolphins or Bears fan. The Bear quarterback situation is a disaster. Only Miami fans can look at the Bears quarterbacks and be envious.
It's a shame Brett Farve didn't ride off into the sunset. At first I thought it was the media stirring up all the unretirement mess. Green Bay should have taken the high road and given Farve his release. Farve is a fierce competator and last year showed he can still be a good player. Realistically though where can Farve step into the starters role and make the team a serious Super Bowl contender? Minnesota comes to mind. Combine Farve with Adrian Peterson and the Vikings defense and the Vikes become a instant threat to win the NFC. However, I don't see Green Bay releasing him to play for a division archrival. The only other teams where Farve might be a good fit are Washington or Buffalo.
As much as it pains me to admit, Dallas is the class of the NFC but the Giants and Vikings are half a step behind. In the AFC it's the Pats and Colts with the Chargers and Jaguars a hair below.
Pittsburgh just has too many questions to be considered an elite team anymore. Age and free agency have caught up with the O-line. Denver and Jacksonville showed the Steelers can be pushed around. The Steelers can still win it all but it is a tough road with the Pats, Colts, Chargers and Jags standing in the way. An interesting side show will be if the Rooney brothers turn the ownership issue into an old man pissing match. As much as I like chaos, I'd hate to see the Rooneys no longer majority owners of the Steelers.
As usual I save my Texans comments for last. The hype is that the this might be the year the Texans make a playoff push. I don't see it happening it all. First of all the Colts and Jags reside in the same division. The Titans will have a big say on how the Texans season will go. The offensive line remains a big question mark. Matt Schaub needs to stay upright all season an running back needs to emerge. The defense has a nice base of young players in Mario Williams, Amobi Akoye and DeMeco Ryans but Dunta Robinson's injury keeps the second player off the field until November. To top it off the first five games are brutal. The first game is at Pittsburgh, first home game with the Ravens and on the road for games @Tennessee and @Jacksonville and the home to face the Colts. A 1-4 start isn't unrealistic and 0-5 is quiet possible.
The early predictions range from 7-9 to 9-7 with a rare 10-6. I'm jumping in on the early prediction business. My bold fearless prognostication is that they go 7-9. They start the season 1-4 with the Ravens the lone victory. The will split the season with the Jags and Titans with two losses to the Colts. Here's to hoping I'm wrong and they make the playoffs.
For the third season I'll be on my perch near the twenty five yard line yelling and wishing bad things on the opponent. In spite of my prediction....BRING ON THE STEELER!!!! That hatred still burns from the Oiler days.
Sunday, July 6, 2008
Spurs & Penguins, Steve Chacon
I'm slowly coming out of my self imposed sports moratorium. It's been my way of the Spurs not winning the NBA title. It's my way of the Pens losing in the Stanley Cup finals. It's my way of coping on how really bad the Astros are. As NFL camps open up, I'll emerge and enmesh myself in the sports I truly love.
Briefly on the Spurs and Pens
You know how far the Spurs have come as a franchise when a season is considered a failure when they don't win the NBA title. Winning four titles will do that to a team and it's fans. That's four more titles than most teams can claim. Obviously expectations will have to come down sometime. Tim Duncan and Manu Ginobilli are on the downside of their careers. The window for a title is probably two, maybe three, years unless the team can add some top notch bona fide youth. I've heard fans and message boards talk about Plan 2010. Seems they believe the team has a plan to reload in 2010 and continue the success. That remains to be seen.
On the other end of the spectrum are the Pittsburgh Penguins. They boast youth and scoring in Sidney Crosby and resigned Evgeni Malikin. For the Pens the future looks bright. The plowed throw the Eastern Conference in the playoffs before being brushed aside in the Finals. While it was a disappointing result, it was also an unexpected run. I figured they were a year or two plus a defender and a top notch goalie from nailing it all down. The are obviously on the right track and hope they stay on course. Here's to hoping for a Stanley Cup dynasty.
Steve Chacon
My two cents. By now it's old news what happened in the Astros club house. Steve Chacon is history and Ed Wade has egg on his face. Chacon was already unhappy about his demotion to the bullpen and was agitating for a trade through his agent.
Obviously Chacon's behavior is unacceptable but Wade bares responsibility too. Wade lost his cool and told Chacon that he needed to "go look in the mirror." According the Ken Rosenthal, Ed Wade already has a reputation for his temper from his Philly days. Wade is supposed to be a team lead and should have taken the high road in this. He should have let Chacon throw his tantrum and then later suspend him for insubordination. Chacon had no intention of going to manager Cecil Cooper's office. That should have been the nail in his coffin and not the physical confrontation.
Briefly on the Spurs and Pens
You know how far the Spurs have come as a franchise when a season is considered a failure when they don't win the NBA title. Winning four titles will do that to a team and it's fans. That's four more titles than most teams can claim. Obviously expectations will have to come down sometime. Tim Duncan and Manu Ginobilli are on the downside of their careers. The window for a title is probably two, maybe three, years unless the team can add some top notch bona fide youth. I've heard fans and message boards talk about Plan 2010. Seems they believe the team has a plan to reload in 2010 and continue the success. That remains to be seen.
On the other end of the spectrum are the Pittsburgh Penguins. They boast youth and scoring in Sidney Crosby and resigned Evgeni Malikin. For the Pens the future looks bright. The plowed throw the Eastern Conference in the playoffs before being brushed aside in the Finals. While it was a disappointing result, it was also an unexpected run. I figured they were a year or two plus a defender and a top notch goalie from nailing it all down. The are obviously on the right track and hope they stay on course. Here's to hoping for a Stanley Cup dynasty.
Steve Chacon
My two cents. By now it's old news what happened in the Astros club house. Steve Chacon is history and Ed Wade has egg on his face. Chacon was already unhappy about his demotion to the bullpen and was agitating for a trade through his agent.
Obviously Chacon's behavior is unacceptable but Wade bares responsibility too. Wade lost his cool and told Chacon that he needed to "go look in the
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