NFL Week 7, Results vs. the Spread and Week 8 Picks

Ha, I bet you thought you escaped my weekly NFL email. Since I'm off from work for this week and next, I haven't had the ungodly amount of time I normally have to think up mindless NFL ravings. Fear not, for I have made time this afternoon. Next week is my bye week. I'll be out of town.

Everyday I wake up and run to check the internet for one or both of the following headlines:

"Chiefs Fire Worst Head Coach in the NFL! Herm Edwards to be buried underneath 'I' in north endzone!"

"Texans Fire Worst Defensive Coordinator in the History of Man!"

Unfortunately I wake up and don't see those headlines. Oh well, at least I woke up one day to see that Matt Millen was fired. I'll have to wait to the offseason for the other two stories.

To quote Jimmy Johnson,"How 'bout dem Cowgirls?" To quote Nelson from the Simpsons,"Ha Ha!"

The preordained, annointed Super Bowl Champ Cowgirls are falling apart at the seems. Terrell Owens is being shut down. Mr. Jessica Simpson's wee wee is hurting (or pinky). Roy Williams is out for the season. So they traded half next year's draft for Detriot's Roy Williams (you can never have to many Roy Williams. I hear that if you keep an open box of Arm and Hammer near a Roy Williams it will keep him fresh for a few years). Losers of the last three of four games puts the hurting girls in a big hole look up at the Giants and Redskins.....Ha Ha!

It's time to once again revisit the 2006 draft. Mario Williams, Reggie Bush and Son of Zeus Vince Young. Once again, who drafted the best player? Hands down the Texans. Williams is just tooling along with his six sacks despite the double teams and no help from the rest of the defense. He'll be good for a few more multi-sack games and will be among the league leaders. Bush is out for 3-5 weeks, once again proving he can't survive the game to game rigors fo the NFL. The Titans are right where they thought they would be after they drafted Son of Zeus Vince Young. I'm sure though that they didn't envision Son of Zeus Vince Young would be such a basketcase, crybaby. Who would have thought it would be Kerry Collins leading the last undefeated team of season Titans?

Once again I'll state for the record that Son of Zeus Vince Young will prove to be one of the most overrated draft picks. Ugly throwing motion, low completion percentage and the intelligence of a tomato won't cut it in the NFL. It still amazes me that there are VY apologists out there. Rich Lard, Richard Justice and Jerome Solomon continue to sing praises to Son of Zeus Vince Young and any negative but truthful comments on the Houston Chronicle message boards will draw the ire of people who would line up to be VY's fluffer. Even more amazing is that there are folks that still berate the Texans for not taking Young.

My Player of the Week: St. Louis Ram RB Steven Jackson. Jackson had 160 yards on 25 carries for 3 TDs and an average of 6.4 yards per carry in the Rams 34-14 rout of the Cowgirls. Ha ha!

The Joe Piscarcik/Carson Palmer Player of the Week: KC Chief's RB Larry Johnson. Johnson had 0 yards on 0 carries for 0 TDs. Johnson was suspended for last week's game against the Titans for undisclosed reasons. The undisclosed reasons are that he allegedly pushed a woman at a night club. The incident has the cops involved on some level. It's not Johnson's first clob shoving incident.

My favorite special team player of the week is the Texans punter Matt Turk. During the game I turned to my buddy and said the coffin corner kick was a lost art. Turk didn't nail the coffin corner but he placed three beautiful punts inside the five in the last quarter to help the Texans defeat the Detroit Lions 28-21.

Sunday is the last of four home games in a row for the Texans. It's been fun going to games every Sunday. Unfortnately the price for it is only one home game in November.

Have a good week and I'll have my ramblings back after my bye week next week.

NFL Week 7 results vs. the Spread
Not a good week against the spread. I lost 6-7.

Highlights on the ledger, on the losing side I thought the Dolphins were going to put up enough points to beat the Ravens by more than three. Didn't happen and it hurt the bottom line. Another game I whiffed big on was taking the Cowboys over the Rams. The wheels are falling off the bandwagon faster than I thought. I thought they were hold out until December. The Saints and Colts get blown out to make it no contest and put another two marks on the losing side. I picked the Texans to beat the spread but they almost imploded and won by seven. The half point in the Bucs-Hawks game made a difference. Bucs won by ten and they were a 10.5 favorite.

On the winning side, I went with obvious picks like Titans over the Chiefs and Steelers over the Bengals. The only dog I went with was the Browns over the Redskins. Skins won but didn't cover so it put up a win for me.

Week 8 Picks vs. the Spread

Raiders(+7) @Ravens - It's feast or famine with the Ravens offense. JeMarcus Russell has been a major disappointment so far. Ravens

Chargers(-3) @Saints - Reggie Bush is out but Drew Brees is playing like an MVP. The Saints defense is suspect though. Chargers

Chiefs(+13) @Jets - Larry Johnson is out again due to team suspension. Jets

Bills(-1.5) @Dolphins - Bills should put up plenty against the Fish. Bills

Buccaneers(+1.5) @Cowboys - Former Bucs QB goes against the team he won a Super Bowl against. Cowboys are the walking wounded and the Romper Room of the NFL. Bucs

Falcos(+9) @Eagles - Eagles are trying to put it together for a run in the tough NFC East. +9 is to generous to the once hapless Falcons. Take the points and the Falcons

Rams(+7) @Patriots - The Pats put up some points on the Broncos last week. The Rams are resurgent under new interim coach Jim Hasslet. Ram RB Steve Jackson is hurt. I'm taking the Pats to win but the Rams will keep it close.

Cardinals(+4) @Panthers - Kurt Warner is having a pretty good year. I think they win. Cardinals

Redskins(-7.5) @Lions - Lions pulled it close to the Texans to beat the spread. I don't think they will against the Redskins.

Browns(+7 @Jaguars - I'm not a trend player but I have gone with the underdog Browns the last two weeks and it's paid off. Why not make it three for the Browns.

Giants(-2.5) @Steelers - Steelers are very tough at home but the Giants are playing with the same us against the world mentality that they took the Super Bowl. It will come down to the Giants d-line vs. Steelers o-line. I think the Giants win the line battle.

Seahawks(+5) @49ers - The Seahawks are the walking wounded of the NFL. 49ers

Bengals(+9.5) @Texans - Texans can't stop anyone all game long. Bengals

Colts(+4) @Titans - I thought the Colts were back but Green Bay exposed them. Titans have the defense and the running game that will prevail against the Colts. Titans